This is a raw public journal in which I have constructed to share my thoughts, moments, and adventures.
Yesterday
6:52 PM
Yesterday, Tuesday, April 26, 2016, was the last day I was going to be able to walk through the turnstiles into Disneyland whenever I pleased.
Yesterday, was such a saddening day. For my heart and soul.
Yesterday, was the last time I'd get to spend my minutes––at a place I felt at home. A place that was actually like home.
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It was about 7pm when I decided I needed to go to Disneyland. One last time. I had worked all day so I didnt have much time. Alone I went, parked in Downtown Disney. It was 7:21pm when I realized I've wanted to take photos of the flowers the cast members (or gardeners?) have planted for the spring time. The sun was making its way down so I knew I had to hurry. I needed to get those photos before it got dark. I walked fast. I went through the Grand Hotel to get to California Adventures instead of going through the front. I had no time to take anything in (as for it being the last time I'd freely be able to step foot in California Adventures again). As I was getting closer to the view of the mickey ferris wheel, I noticed it was sectioned off by ropes for world of color. I was starting to feel panic. I wanted needed to get those photos. The sky was a beautiful blue and orange. I walked up to the cast member and explained to him what I wanted to do after him informing me I wasnt able to go down to the area I was wishing for because I did not have a fast pass. After explaining what I wanted to do, he was so kind enough to let me through. He took me down to the flowers, the beautiful pink carolina roses (1). "Here! This is perfect. I dont need to go further", I said. We stopped and I leaned in to capture photos of the pink roses with the ferris wheel in the back, with the sun setting. I took maybe fifteen photos. Oh so beautiful. So so very beautiful. I turned back to him and thanked him from the bottom of my heart. After that, I needed to get to Disneyland. There were flowers there I've seen that I desperately needed to take photos of. As I was walking towards the exit of DCA, near the Wine Country Trattoria I spotted yellow carolina roses (2) and I just had to stop and snap some quick photos. Those too where quite beautiful. I quickly made my way out of California Adventure's, walked through the middle to get to the entrance of Disneyland. Thats's when it hit me. That was going to be the last time I get to walk into Disneyland whenever I wished. I made my way towards matterhorn where I remembered seeing foxgloves (3), the sun was already almost gone and my heart was starting to sink. Walked around and took photos of flowers throughout the park. As it became nightfall, I just walked. Walked through every little part of Disneyland. Listening to teenagers laugh and children cry and parents talking. They all didnt know I was there. They all didnt know what I was doing. But I knew. // I was walking down mainstreet to get to a shop to buy one last thing from Disneyland. After making my purchase, I started walking towards the exit. Walking underneath that bridge and the emotions started to kick in. My eyes were filling up with tears as I was coming closer to the turnstiles to exit. I tried holding back my tears from falling and somehow I was able to manage that. Some might think i'm dramatic, but no one understands my love for Disney and Disneyland. Owning a pass for three years has been such a wonderful privilege. I'm hoping someday to own one once more.
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"To all that come to this happy place: welcome. Disneyland is your land. Here age relives fond memories of the past, and here youth may savor the challenge and promise of the future. Disneyland is dedicated to the ideals, the dreams, and the hard facts that have created America... with hope that it will be a source of joy and inspiration to all the world." -Walt Disney
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